A Collection of Fictional Stories
The Great Thanksgiving Pardon
There once was a Turkey named Jim who lived in the woods of California with his brother John. They both hated Thanksgiving. Every year, young boys in the woods would try to capture them for Thanksgiving dinner. “ I sure am sick of dreaming and thinking of the horrific death cone. I dream about it every Thanksgiving! Why can’t Thanksgiving just come and go? Why I'd be happier if all turkey’s could only be hunted on Thanksgiving day! But from October to Thanksgiving day? Who’d ever heard of such a thing?” Said Jim.
Yes, this is what all turkeys think about Thanksgiving. What horror they must feel. “I agree, but if you aren’t fond of the death cone, then why were you a death cone for Halloween?” questioned John, who is a very wise bird.
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"Because it is the perfect scary costume! John, you do know that costume won me 20 pounds of candy, my most EVER!” Explained Jim,
”When you put it that way, it makes a lot of sense.” “Say” Exclaimed Jim, “ How about we ask the President for an official Pardon!” “Great idea Jim but the President doesn't speak Turkey.” Says John. “We must think of a solution!” Says Jim.
The Turkeys Sat there puzzled and thinking of a way to save themselves for a week straight!(with the occasional nap). Finally, Jim Remembered something.” I read something a while ago that says that the Prez has a Turkey talker 1000!” Says Jim,”You mean he can understand what we are saying?” Asked John,”Yep replied Jim. “I still have the article. Want to take a look?” asked Jim, “Sure!” John replied”Okay,here it is!” “COOL!”. "Okay, let’s start the long trip to Washington D.C!”
The Turkeys packed their things and started the long journey. They passed through Las Vegas, Nevada and couldn’t help gambling a little bit. However, money was not kind to them. “Look at the size of that pyramid!”,
They said to each other after passing the famous Las Vegas pyramid.
They Crossed the Ohio bridge into West Virginia and they were exhausted after reaching the Potomac River in Maryland. “Are we there yet?” Asked Jim to John,”Yep. We’ve crossed the Potomac into Washington D.C!” Replied John.
“Let's go to the white House then! White House, here we come! After much Perseverance, the Turkeys managed to ask the President for a pardon which he did happily, with the help of the Turkey Talker 1000. The two turkeys lived a happy life and it is my understanding that they are still alive to this day.
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The End
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The Adventures of Horus the Crab Volume 1
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By Garry Gabbage
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Chapter 1: The waterfront mission
In the 1940s, a crab named Horus was sent out by the U.S government to fight the Nazi’s. He was sent out with nothing but a rifle and food, but he was a very successful soldier. Nobody even knew he existed. Not even U.S. soldiers! He had stolen a Fokker Biplane and had bombed 120 bases!
Today we will talk about one important mission he had. He was sent to destroy all the enemy subs and ships on the U.S coast. One day, Horus was flying in his airplane when he heard the government radio him about the mission. “Roger that!” he said after being radioed the mission.
“First, I will attack a ship and steal it. I’ll use it to attack the other ships.” he simply stated. He climbed aboard and said “Aha! I hope you are ready to be pinched to death,” He pinched the captain in half, the soldiers he smashed with his claws, and he shattered the rest like glass.
He then threw the corpses overboard, and took
over the ship. But to his horror, he accidentally pinched the steering wheel off! “Oh no!” he said, “How will I drive it now?”
He quickly found a piece of metal and clawed it into a steering wheel shape. Horus was a California giant crab who measured about 4 feet tall and about 6 feet wide, so most tasks were pretty easy for him. Even carving and slicing thick steel and wood.
He put his makeshift wheel into place and it drove like a dream! “Now to destroy my first sub ever” he thought. He carved a whole on the bottom of it and it sank! “Success!” he said. Then, he moved on to a ship that was very difficult to destroy. He got stuck in the ship as it sank!
The captain on this ship caught sight of the ship Horus was in while it was still partially afloat and took a picture of it
He strained under the pressure. The ship was sinking fast! He must think of something before he hits the bottom. (He was a land crab) He decided to grab a dead guy and used him as a tool to pry him out of the ship. He was in a small room, and there was a small hole too small for him so he put the dead guy in the hole and used him to pry the hole open. He was able to get out and surface! Horus gasped for air. He was happy that he survived. “What a close call!” he said. Then, he continued his journey.
But then, as he continued his journey, he turned around and gasped. A surprise attack! He batted down every fighter till the last one. The last one was tricky and he tried his hardest, but couldn't get him! Eventually, with one quick strike he somehow barely threw the intruder off the ship. He then started the trip home to his crab family. He got back to the mainland and took off his Fokker airplane. He was flying across Lake Michigan, when his engine sputtered out! He tried to maneuver his airplane back on his course, but in doing so, he started to stall! He was able to make it to the beach, but he crashed there. He was unconscious!
He eventually woke up, but he was in poor condition. He heaved the airplane parts out of his way and as he was doing so, he saw a gas leak! It was seeping into the boiling hot engine, and Horus could smell something burning! He rushed out as fast as he could and helplessly watched his prized airplane burn to the ground.
Today was a sad day for Horus. He couldn’t bear losing his airplane, but he was able to move on. He started the long walk to California. He sneaked on a train once he crossed the Ohio border. He then made it to his home. He was happy to be with his family once again.
THE END
Chapter 2: The army of one crab
One day, Horus received a message from the government saying he was on a land mission to destroy tanks and bases. This was exciting for him because he had never been on a land mission before. He had just been on air and sea missions. Horus jumped into an American tank and was on his way.
He crossed the front lines. Suddenly, enemy shells approached from all directions! He tried to get away, but his tank started to catch on fire! If Horus doesn't do something quick, he and his tank will surely catch mumps and measles again (It happens when he’s frightened), mash his fingers, fall off the edge of the world, and his tank will die before it is twelve!
With a swift motion, he managed to drive his tank to a pier. It was a courageous move, but he decided all he could do was drive his tank off the pier into the water. It would extinguish the flame and the Nazis could never find him. He held his breath and dove in.
Horus just barely made it past the pier before he plunged into the water. The tank urged forward onto the beach. The Nazis were gone. Horus then discovered an abandoned Nazi Fokker just like his old one.
He got in the Fokker and took off. It was a beautiful sight. His mission was in France and he was so high that he could see the Eiffel tower. Then, out of nowhere, Nazi bullets from the antiaircraft guns shot passed him! Horus dodged one, escaped a second round of bullets, only to be hit near the engine by the third!
Horus called the US on the radio. “Help! I’m going to crash,” But his words were in vain, for he found that the radio was broken.
The Nazis figured Horus was as good as dead. However, they didn’t know Horus was a crab; and a very smart crab too. Horus was an expert mechanic, so he fixed the plane in
mid-air at record time! Thankfully, the Nazis were gone by then, so he wasn’t greeted with more bullets.
After hours of flying in his trusty new plane, Horus saw a base in the distance (If you could even call it a base. It was more like a giant circus tent). Horus flew over the “base”, ripped open the tent by reaching out with his large claw, and then he attacked on land. He began thinking this would be just like all his other invasions; but no. This one was his toughest yet.
This base knew about Horus, but didn’t want to disturb Hitler about it in fear of angering him, so they were the only base who knew about him. Horus didn’t know this. He came to find himself surrounded by people wearing titanium suits! He couldn’t crush them! “What the…….” He began to say, but he was wiped off his feet by a tank and a man showed up with a giant power saw! They were going to literally cut him in half!
However, at the last second, when the brave Horus himself was thinking “This is the end of Horus the Giant Californian Crab,” a mysterious female crab showed up. She was beautiful. She grabbed all the Nazis in the camp and, to Horus’s surprise, flew away!
“Goodbye. Don’t thank me,” she said in a strange, mysterious, yet lovely voice. She then flew away. Horus never saw her again.
“I can’t believe it! It’s wonderful. That was a crab angel. I’ve been saved by a crab angel!” Horus was very happy to be spared. This crab never expected to be saved by anyone. He never thought people would ever figure him out. He was wrong, but he didn’t care. He was alive. Alive and that was all that mattered.
The END
Chapter 3: Under arrest
There was little chance Horus could get out of this one. He was helping a new undercover crab like him. The undercover crab, named Harry, was driving a boat to a Nazi ship so they could attack it. However, Harry made a wrong turn and smashed into the ship. They were arrested and put in the ship’s prison. They were then taken to Germany and put in a German prison. Horus was scolding Harry for what he had done when he had an idea. “Of course!” he whispered, “I can use my claws to break through the bars!”
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He broke through the bars and tiptoed through the prison. Thankfully, the guard was
sleeping. Horus got by him safely. “Thanks for saving us! I’ll be much more careful in the future!” said Harry, “I’m sure you will. The good thing is, we’re outta here,” replied Horus. “Let’s hurry. The searchlight is up.” It was no use! They were spotted.
Horus was attacked by 20 soldiers! Then, Horus felt a huge phenomenon occur deep within his shell. He grew to be a HUGE crab instead of a giant crab in the blink of an eye. He smashed and battered every last soldier. He threw em’ through the air, smashed em’ on the ground, and ripped em up. Harry helped too.
”well done, Horus! I almost fainted when you
grew like that. How’d you do that?” asked Harry, “I don’t know,” replied Horus.
That’s all of Horus’s adventures I’ll share today. Soon, volume two will arrive! Thanks for reading.
The end
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Horus with his Grandson Horus II or Horry
Horus is an undercover crab who fought in World War II
He has had many adventures in his career.
Today, Horus lives in a resort in California with his wife
Angelina coconut, a coconut crab. Even though they are
different in size, they love each other.
Copywrong 2020 no rights reserved. If you’re a criminal or looking to steal information, look no further! If this book has been used without permission or stolen, the criminal will be qualified for up to 0 seconds in jail or a $0 fine.
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The Football Player Who Couldn't Play football.
In the 2021 NFL draft, a “promising” player named Duhmoonte Floopymarsh was drafted by the 2-14 Cincinnati Bengals. He was drafted out of Despair University in Terrible, Florida. Floopymarsh was a first round draft pick, so his expectations were high. On Floopymarshe’s first preseason game, he ran the wrong way (He was a running back) and his total yards totaled -183. This was good for a Bengal but he could improve. He scored 20 safeties and blocked 8 of his own teams field goals. After the preseason, he was fired because of his foolish ways. Later, the Dolphins came along. They picked the free agent up and taught Floopymarsh the ways of football. He had his first positive game of his career with 1 yard and only 2 accidental safeties. Then, in week 16, it was the fourth quarter against the Steelers. The crowd was roaring at the offense to get a score. If the Dolphins won this game, they would get a playoff berth for the first time since 2016 and there first bye since 1992. The Dolphins were 3 and 2 at the Steeler’s 5 yard line. They threw an interception! That day, Duhmoonte was caught blocking his team members. Then for the second time, he was fired! Duhmoonte was devastated. He had only forgot one little thing about football.
Then one day, he decided to try the famous action-packed sport of curling! “All I have to do is shove a puck down an ice track.” he thought to himself, “ I can me a star in moments!”(So he thought). Nobody, not even me thought he would be the star he was when he was curling. He was undefeated till his last curl in 2025. In it, he hit someone in the head with the stick 20 times in a row by accident, so he was suspended from curling for life. (curling is a very serious sport) The man after being hit in the head 20 times In 2026, Duhmoonte decided to go back into football. He was picked as a free agent by the LA Chargers in June. He had a career high 10 rushing yards in week 1 and his first touchdown in week 5. Then bad luck came back. He got a concussion and forgot most of his football skills and so he was fired and in 2028, was picked up by the now 0-16 Bengals once again. After many years, Duhmoonte learned skills and finished the 2060 season at 63 years old with 5,000 rushing yards, and 15 rushing/passing touchdowns which is a great season.
THE
END
THE HARRISON BROTHERS BOOK 1: THE GREAT WWII MYSTERY
In 1942, the Battle of Stalingrad was fought. It was the Nazis vs the Soviet Union in Russia. The Soviets won, but the Nazis left behind a secret weapon that they weren't able to use. It was a massive tank destroyer nicknamed Noah's ark, even though it was over four times as long as the ark. The Soviet defeated the Nazis before they could enter Noah’s Ark. The journal German soldier of Andreas McCarmos is the only known record of the ship-like destroyer.
Over 8 decades later, the Harrison brothers heard about this tank. The Harrison brothers are two 18 year old twins. Aaron, the wiser one of the two and Joshua, or Josh the more adventurous and less cautious boy. Their father was an archaeologist and their mother was a science teacher at Stanford University. The boys excelled in all their school subjects.
“Hey Aaron” Exclaimed Josh. “Remember that news story about the discovery of a journal entry about the giant monster tank?” “Wish I could go there and dig it out of the ground!” “Well your in luck!” Exclaimed Josh, “I bought us Plane tickets to Russia were it’s Rumored to be buried! We leave tonight!”. “Great! Thanks man! I can't wait!"
The Harrison Brothers live in Jumping Acres, a very unknown suburb of Sacramento CA, so it’s a long trip to the airport in California traffic and it’s also 40 miles away, but it’s nice to live away from downtown and closer to the California woods which provide much for the Harrisons.
"Okay I'm all packed up and ready to go!” Exclaimed Josh “Me too. Let’s go!” said an eager Aaron. The Boys said bye to their parents and started the 15 hour journey to Russia. It wasn’t pleasant and Josh had to sit next to an obese man, but they made it to Russia
When they got there, some angry southerner flight attendant gave them a piece of paper and told them “Some loser from Russia who I ain’t fond of made me give this to ya’ and I'm sorry if it’s a threat letter but I was ordered to give it to ya’ so here’s duh piece ‘o’ paper!” “Thanks Mam” The boys said politely. “Some person.” “YEAH! Let’s read the paper though even if this person has poor language!” Replied Aaron. The boys laughed until they read the paper. It said in unclear scribbled but altogether frightening letters:
ABANDON THE SEARCH FOR THE TANK!
IF YOU DON’T YOU WILL REGRET IT!
DO YOU WANT TO LIVE OR FOOLISHLY
DIE? CHOOSE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
“Should we head Back?” asked Aaron “No. Anyway I brought our IWI Negev NG7 automatic rifles. You can never trust Russians if you are American. Also like my good angry southerner friend would say, ‘I ain’t afraid o dat guy with awful handwritn’” “Yes that’s true!” laughingly replied Aaron.
With rifles in hand, the Boys reached the area Noah’s Ark was rumored to rest. “Josh, let’s search the area for any ammunition, pieces of metal, or components that might be on largest tank ever.”
“Look what I found!” Said Josh “It looks like a…..AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!...” Just then, the tank component he grabbed to examine had pulled him under the thin, smooth desert sand! “ Where are you Josh! Josh! Josh?"
Just then, Josh’s brown hair started to emerge out of the desert sand. Then his head, his torso and finally Josh himself appeared seamlessly out of the pure sand. “Josh what happened to you?” “Aaron, I grabbed hold of the end of a tank machine gun sticking out of the sand and down I went in to an underground lagoon. I was frantic to get out and I got a glimpse of what could be the tank, but I had to get out before I could study anything”
“Let’s go and sleep In the hotel” “Okay” replied a stunned and tired Josh. They sat down to a wonderful Russian dinner of bread as an appetizer, Reindeer sausage, Beef Stroganoff, (A Russian version of Hungarian Goulash) and a Pashka cake dessert.
In the morning, the boys returned to the worksite with scuba gear and they went underwater where Josh had gone under. What they saw was UNBELIEVABLE and what they saw next was even more insane. “Josh, look!” Arron said through his under-sea radio, It’s the tank destroyer! That thing’s absolutely MASSIVE! Nice job, Josh you found the tank!” “Thanks Aaron, but you found it."
“But you found the lagoon entrance!” protested Aaron, “Okay, I'll take the credit.” . “Oh no”, “keep your distance. This isn’t over.” Angrily explained Josh, “Remember that threat letter?” “Yeah” “Well the reason for that letter was that someone was smuggling illegal drugs into the massive ship. Just look at the smuggler submarine! Its 40 feet long, but it looks like a fly compared to the Ark.”. “This really stinks that these people would dare waste an artifact to put drugs in it” Aaron declared with a twinkle of revenge in his eye, “I know how you feel. Let’s sneak out and let the Russian Drug control know about this.”
The two boys (now the two young sleuths ) told the drug control department but the officer simply said: “We are too busy drinking wolf milk and capturing real criminals to listen to an American and his Nazi folktale story! That tank was just a rumor to scare us and that is what our government assured us!”
The two sleuths found that convincing was no use so they returned to the hotel and thought about their situation.
They came to the conclusion that they had to call the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) in the U.S.A. to get things straight. The DEA members got to Russia immediately and they
used radar to discover where the sub is.
The Harrison brothers rented a boat and chased the sub down. “There it is!” both boys yelled while pointing at the old beat up sub, they were gaining on the sub when they noticed a gasoline leak coming from the sub. “That flammable gas will do the dirty work for us! That sub will Blow up in no time at all!” said Josh, “Your right Josh, let’s keep our distance. I’ll take a picture with my grandpa’s ancient second-hand camera!” KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM The sub sure did blow up. Pieces were everywhere and it blew up just in
time for a picture!
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The boy’s high-fived, the DEA members arrested the somehow still alive criminals, and they headed back. The trip home was similar to the trip there, but this time Aaron had the fat guy. When the brothers got back from Russia, they learned they were national heroes and that Noah’s Ark was being restored in the Smithsonian National Museum of American History. When they landed, their parents were waiting for them. “Mom! Dad!” said the boys, “God bless you are okay!”, said their mom, “Guess you had a boring trip, boys”, Joked their dad.
Later that night, the boys decided they would apply to be detectives in the FBI. “Gee I wonder what adventures our lives will give us next?”, Questioned Josh. “I was thinking the same thing myself."
THE END